For everyone who believes happiness needs “feel natural”, but who struggles to find and especially to keep it.
Please only read if you WILL take responsibility for your own happiness. Otherwise this post will make you unhappy.
You flirt with HAPPINESS,
but when HAPPINESS flirts back, you run.
You try thing after thing,
hoping to be hit by something
THAT WILL MAKE YOU STOP SWIPING!
Here’s the truth:
You can’t look HAPPINESS in the eye.
You fear the chaos, the darkness,
the fear and confusion that guard its door.
You kill the moment
with your tsunami of expectations you dump on your here and now.
The impossible future you construct for yourself,
you choose to trust
it more than the experience that enters
your body through your 6 senses.
You tell yourself
that you think too much,
that you are confused,
that you just don’t know HOW to find what feels right.
Here’s more truth:
The question is not: “HOW can you?”
The question is: “Will you?”
When you have a chance,
to be HAPPY
and to stay with it,
and to believe it was REAL,
WILL YOU choose to accept
In order to feel HAPPY
you must trust HAPPINESS exists.
Not just as a far-away concept,
but as a real thing in your life.
But you can’t trust that reality.
Because you fear HAPPINESS will eventually disappear.
Be taken away from you.
You fear it so badly.
You have perfect faith,
in that reality
where HAPPINESS stays only shortly.
And the moment it disappears,
feels like torture.
In your world that moment will certainly come.
It will feel like a sting that pierces through you,
your diaphragm contracts,
your heart rate rises and
you start breathing heavily.
maybe you fight. Maybe you flight.
Maybe both. And you shiver in the alternate current of tension and paralysis.
Yes, you’re hooked. #alarm.
When HAPPINESS knocks your door,
You rush into distance.
Hoping to be spared from your fear of loss.
And you indulge
into secure numbness.
Where you are telling yourself
that you just HAVEN’T FIGURED OUT HOW TO BE HAPPY.
Here’s more truth:
You are guilty.
Guilty of hiding when HAPPINESS reaches out a small and timid hand,
Guilty of ignoring the signs showing you what you love and who you really are,
Guilty of saying “Not sure” when you should say “YES”.
Understand that you are imprisoned.
Imprisoned by your illusion of lack,
By your illusion that your parents have power over you,
By your illusion of pain and pleasure,
By your illusion of time passing,
By your illusion that you are happy when you get what you want!
And more truth:
Right now, you trust that unhappiness wins.
In your reality HAPPINESS is always taken away from you.
It is temporary. It interrupts unhappiness.
Hence, unhappiness remains.
As the stable ground of your universe.
What if you started to dare to believe that it was the other way round?
What if you dared to believe that it is NOT unhappiness that is interrupted by HAPPINESS.
But HAPPINESS that is interrupted by unhappiness.
What if HAPPINESS was endless?
Is that something you can dare to believe? Dare to KNOW?
Can you take care of your own HAPPINESS? Make THAT the stable ground of your universe?
Here’s some hope:
Understand that the key to your prison door
Is INSIDE your cell.
Hand it to someone
who sees you and who loves you.
Ask that person to give you homework.
Do the homework.
Walk through the door they opened for you.
Lean into the nothing.
And just wait what comes up.
We love you.
We really do.
Your dedicated Arc Crew.
Who do YOU dare to be?